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Relationship Counselling
Couple relationships begin with interest and curiosity in one another, followed by exploring shared interests and experiences. As connections deepen, a romantic phase emerges with engaging and fun experiences. Over time, the novelty usually fades as the partners gets to know one another, and this can sometimes lead to a power struggle which requires resolving. Being able to accept each other's differences and navigate any conflict which arises is crucial for the relationship's future.
When such challenges are well-managed, relationships usually flourish and move on to stability, security and routine. Couples are committed to make long-term plans and formalize the partnership. In a co-creation phase, partners work together towards common goals like building a family, a life or a shared vision.
Therapeutic couple counselling can be useful during any of these phases, to learn more about ourselves and how we function in relationships. Many couples benefit from having a space where they can discuss relationship challenges and differences. A counsellor can foster open and honest communication, working to ensure that both partners feel heard, valued, respected, trusted, safe and supported. You can learn new insights about yourself in a relationship, learn to resolve conflicts constructively and keep the romance alive through shared activities, surprises and regular expressions of love.
What happens when relationships don't go so well?
A struggling relationship can be overwhelming and feels very private. Self-blame, guilt, and shame may arise, making it hard to handle. Harsh words, hurt feelings, wounds, and broken trust often emerges.
Sometimes relationships become very conflicted, with a lot of unending arguments: it becomes loud, it's like a tug-o-war, with each person trying to maintain their way of doing and being at any cost. The relationship can become competitive where there always has to be a "winner" and always a "loser". The environment becomes very 'positional', with raised voices, finger-pointing and blame. It's no longer fun, and the space has become very tense.
Tension affects everyone in the family - adults, children and even pets
Relationship conflict can strain family dynamics, leading to tension, miscommunication, and emotional stress. Children and adolescents may face developmental challenges, including having difficulties with managing their emotions, not performing well at school, and having trouble forming trusting relationships. Family pets may also become stressed and behave badly or differently due to felt tension or lack of attention.
Resolving conflict is essential for family harmony. Family counselling can teach conflict-resolution strategies, improve the emotional environment for children which ultimately supports their growth. This can help restore trust and communication, strengthening all the relationships and overall dynamics of the family or group. Ultimately, counselling empowers families to address issues together, promoting well-being and balance for all family members.
For children, counselling can help them to express the big emotions and difficult thoughts that come up in tense environments. Home can become a healthier emotional environment, making home feel less tense and unpredictable. This in turn creates a more nurturing atmosphere, which supports children's emotional and cognitive development.
Counselling can help restore trust and communication among all family members; this strengthens relationships and improves overall dynamics. Ultimately, counselling can empower families to address issues together, promoting harmony, emotional well-being, and a balanced environment for everyone, including the pets and fur-babies.
All relationships go through struggles, not just intimate partner relationships - it might be parents trying to maintain boundaries in parenting, or children growing up and wanting to become individuals in their own rights. Or it could be in-laws learning how to get along with new members of the family. It might be co-workers with different communication styles learning to work together in a shared professional environment. Or tension in a social group where people need to get along in order to enjoy their shared activities. Whatever type of relationship you are in, time will bring changes and possible challenges - change is the only constant in life.
Take a proactive step to begin healing the hurt, and start creating stronger bonds.
Where safe to do so, Thoughtful Connections offers relationship counselling for intimate partners, family members, parents and children (over age of 7) and other types of non-intimate relationships such as friends, colleagues or work-mates.
Our practitioner Frederica has also trained in mediation and family dispute resolution, and can also provide advice on conflict resolution, parenting plans, and healthy family separation or "healthy uncoupling". Please get in touch to discuss your particular situation.